Reading is probably the number 1 sign of my mood and something no one in my life has ever noticed. It's not the reading makes me happy necessarily (sometimes books can be difficult or sad) but I can only read when happy. When melancholy sets into my bones and stress resides in a large knot on my left shoulder blade, words turn to mush. No concentration or attention will work for me.
So, as always happens in a New Year, you stop and think about the best possible life you could live. For me that goes hand in hand with reading. So rather than decide to go on a diet or learn a language or travel places (all things I actually do want) I thought I would try and find a way to hold onto happiness for a whole year. In no way do I expect or even want to be happy every single day, but I do want to find a way to hold onto it a little longer. Savor it. Mull it over and hence this blog came to fruition on one of my most favorite dates, Friday the 13th.
The hope is that in each book I can take away something with me to help this happiness project. Whether novel or nonfiction or self-help, I want to walk away with an idea, a thought or to make my life better. Maybe it is something as simple as how to not live my life or avoid men who talk obsessively about business cards and font (Patrick Bateman reference right there). Without further adieu, here I go.
I just read and mostly devoured Nina George's The Little Paris Bookshop. Anything billed as a book about books gets my attention. It is a bizarre genre, but one I am obsessed with and always fall in love with (Mr. Penumbra's 24-Hour Bookstore, The Book of Speculation, Shadow of the Wind). So I took on Jean Perdu a book pharmacist. What is a book pharmacist you may ask yourself? It is someone who prescribes books to people to cure ailments or help them achieve something. Need meaning in your life take on Brothers Karamazov, need a piece of happiness something cozy and cuddly to sidle up against you like a kitten, then read The Little Parish Bookshop.
Perdu means lost. This 50 year old man is dealing with a love lost 21 years ago and takes some very interesting characters with him. A 20 year old famous author and an Italian also looking for a love lost. But it's not the love story I find appealing, it's this Jean Perdu. He is transitioning from a life not lived and after a 21 year hiatus you have to learn to live again. At one point he realizes there is a a thing called the Time of Hurt when you end one journey and start another one. This book made me realize maybe I'm going through my Time of Hurt and getting ready to start a new one. Maybe I'm letting go of 7 years in a relationship where I lost a lot of who I was and I'm ready to be ME again. It's scary because it involves finding out who I am and who I want to be. But it is also interesting and exciting and terrifying. Like the things nightmares are made of terrifying, but we all need a kick in the ass and a change in our lives.
When I met my now ex-wife I would never have seen myself as a sales person. I want an academic and pretentious job. I found something I love. I love corporate life, I thrive it in. I want to find someone who loves a lot of the same things I do, I want someone ambitious who lives life not allows herself to be a victim of circumstance.
If this book were a cuisine it would be something rustic. Simple and elegant and it makes me crave the same. I want to visit the South of France and sit on the beach, wake in a B&B and have baguettes and croissants for breakfast. I want simple chickens and potatoes and veggies for dinner on a wood table watching a quieter life. I also want Paris with its glitz. I want to learn to love wine. I want to see this beautiful.
With that I bid you adieu...
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